We live in southwest Oklahoma on a ranch near Altus and we have two kids, Turner who is almost 10 and Taos who will be one in August.  Turner was adopted through Deaconess in 2011 and last year, after 16 years of marriage and years of infertility treatments, we found ourselves experiencing quite a shock of an unexpected pregnancy.  We welcomed Taos last August, 11 days before Turner turned nine!

Turner is involved in many sports.  As a family we enjoy playing golf, cheering on the Texas Tech Red Raiders, skiing, hunting, and traveling!

Why did you choose adoption?

We tried several methods of infertility treatment. After one failed round of IVF, we immediately knew adoption was our next step.  We chose an agency because we wanted assistance through the entire process.  We ultimately chose Deaconess because of the lifelong support they provide to everyone, especially the birth mom.  After attending the seminar our choice was solidified.

Our adoption journey was an amazing experience!  We were fortunate that our first match was with Turner and it did not fall through.  We were not matched until the day he was born and that was a very exciting and emotional day!  His birth mom was ready to meet us when he was 2 days old.  We got to spend 1 night in the hospital and then brought Turner home to meet his family.

We have had a relationship with Turner’s birth mom since day one.  We tried to be very open-minded to maintaining a relationship as long as she wants to.  We last saw her in March of 2020 before Covid hit.  We communicate with her as often as she wants to.  Usually our visits involve a trip to the park or visiting at a restaurant when we can travel to see her.

If you are interested in adoption, definitely follow your heart!  Your family and friends' advice are important but ultimately you have to choose your own path and what you are comfortable with as a couple.  Trust in God’s plan and in his timing. He already knows how your family will be formed and each member.

The Deaconess team has been amazing to work with. I think we may have been one of Heather’s very first families when she came to work for them and we still reach out to her today for help and advice.  She’s always so amazing to help us!  I tease her that she’ll be hearing from me until Turner is 18!  I know Deaconess is still there for Turner’s birth mom as often as she needs them.  The peace that comes from that is invaluable!

Tanner & Tara Holder

Unsubscribe or Manage Your Preferences