Why did you choose adoption?
We had started down the infertility journey in 2011, In the spring of 2012 we discovered Michael had cancer that needed immediate surgery and would close the door on any type of fertility treatments for us. Through the discovery of that we were overcome with joy as well as sorrow. Joy that, in our struggle for children, a life saving discovery had been found regarding Michael’s health that otherwise would have most likely gone undetected until it was too late, but also sorrow that we were now having to choose yet another road to creating a family. We had looked into several different adoption opportunities from DHS, attorneys, embryo adoption, and agencies when my uncle, who is a local attorney in OKC, shared with us about a family he had known that had adopted through Deaconess. We were able to get into a seminar in the fall of 2012. We didn’t know what to expect but after the seminar the Lord made it clear to us that this was a door that was opening for us.
We were matched with a birth mom in January of 2013 and our first son, Isaac, was born in March. We were so humbled by the Lord’s faithfulness to us. Isaac’s birth mom couldn’t have been more welcoming and also showed incredible support to us. We later had a disruption in the fall of 2014, and Deaconess was there with us every step of the way through all the heartache. After experiencing that, even in our hurt, we could look at Isaac and know that not only does this work, but it had worked for us. Later, in April of 2015, the Lord answered our prayers yet again, only this time it was a two for one! We brought the twins, Grace and Gannon, home from the hospital 3 days after they were born. We could not have been more grateful and we had no idea how much fun, yet tiring, it would be to have twins. Once we recovered from having 3 kids under the age of two, we were ready to answer the call God had placed on our hearts and respond to the desire that was still stirring and we looked to adopt again. We brought home Aleigh in the spring of 2020. WHAT A YEAR TO BRING A BABY HOME! She has brought so much fun and joy to our family and we were blessed that even in the trials that year brought, it gave us reason to all be together.
We have contact with all 3 birth moms. Two of them are active in our kids' lives from celebrating birthdays together, attending soccer games, sharing a meal, and whatever else you can think of! It is a great joy to have them in our lives as well as the kids. Two of our kids share biological siblings that have also been adopted and they are active in our lives as well! I cannot express enough how important it has been in the lives of our kids to have contact with each birth mom. From answering questions to sharing milestones with them, it is something we would never want to change.
Adoption has been something that is our natural way of creating a family for us. We understand it can come with fears as well as questions that can be daunting. What we believe though, is that as brothers and sisters in Christ it is something we have all already experienced and it is something that doesn’t push people away from one another but actually draws them to one another. It is a picture of how each of us has been adopted into the family of God. Our advice would be to surround yourselves with support from family, friends, and church. Ask questions and also find rest in the unknown. Creating a family comes with all kinds of unknowns no matter which path you take but find rest in the fact that God goes before us and is already there to guide us.
Deaconess has continued to be there for us with questions or concerns we have regarding our kids and their questions. They were there to pray with us in our lowest part of this journey and they have been there to celebrate with us in the highest times of our journey. We consider them family and could not be more thankful for their ministry and what it has done for us and our kids!